Today, I took on the shawl, marking for me, the start of a
journey to reassemble and remember, to travel backwards to my old self and forwards
to my new self. I need to find my heart and spirit, the home within me after a
five year period of transition. I am to find a new way of being, as a mother.
Being wrapped, held and prayed over, I felt myself reaching
a decision to accept and embrace the teachings of my elders, the circle of
mothers, the circle of grandmothers, great-grandmothers and those who have gone
before. I felt myself coming home into the arms of the earth, in sisterhood
with all mothers.
Perhaps closing the bones and taking the shawl is an
invitation to live in harmony and honour the sacred spaces of all life. The
fibres pull us into alignment, showing us the beauty and might of our own
creation. As the shawl draped my shoulders, I felt home.
As a mother, it is easy to forget yourself. This was an
important process of remembering, in terms of both essence and potential for
being. I am now coming back to the magic of home that I so strongly believe in
and try to create, to a sense of wellbeing, and temporarily forgotten vitality.
In mothering, I have found the simplicity of happiness, and the
simple truths to live by that support the inner joy that is the home within me.
Wearing the shawl has allowed me to be on the receiving end of love, as a new being,
a vessel, and a mother, who is ever loving to others.
Children who are too little to walk need to be carried and
held. Shawls and fabric wrap around and help me to fulfil this, my duty of responsibility
to them as they gently descend, first to birth, then walk under the sky,
earthside. In the wheel of life, perhaps the shawl also carries parts of
ourselves? Every person walking on the earth has a responsibility to the
children of tomorrow, thus, we all carry the shawl in our hearts, whether we
are parents, or not; we all carry the warp and weft of the future. To influence
this, participation is necessary, and I feel my warrior side rising up to
answer this call. Like a personal medicine, the fibres has called me back to
myself.
Within the holding, there is inner peace, through balancing the
self with truth and understanding my role in creation; to honour my blessings.
Being held in sacred space, by sacred women, has allowed a quickening to take
place, a healing of one reality into another, an exchange that allows my heart
to sing, again.
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